Ten months

My baby is ten months today. Wow, it has flown. After crying for 45 minutes during the night, he blissfully slept in this morning while I got ready for work. While I hate waking him in the morning, I love watching him sleep peacefully for a few minutes before I wake him. This morning, he was rolled over on his side. That's a new one on me. Usually he's on his tummy with his legs tucked up underneath him.

Somehow he stayed asleep, or at least in the drowsy, dreamy state with his eyes closed while I changed him, fed him, and laid him in the floor so I could get dressed for work. I LOVE the feeling of his big heavy head on my shoulder when he's sleepy. I think I could hold him like that all day.

Constant conflict

Who knew how conflicting motherhood would be? There were sooooo many things I was unprepared for and these conflicting emotions sum up a lot of those things.

Sometimes when I'm with Preston, I can't wait for a break, yet once I'm away from him, I can't wait to get back to him. He is so clingy with me these days that sometimes it wears on me, but when he nuzzles down into my neck for comfort, there is no better feeling in the world. I could hold him and rock him forever.

We worked and worked to get him to sleep through the night (which is still not totally consistent) but the first time he did it, it scared us to death! Surely he must have stopped breathing!

And part of me is really looking forward to weaning him when he turns one in just a couple of months. I'm ready for freedom in a greater than four hour window (yes, I'm gone from him longer than that, but only for work). Yet at the same time, I'm greiving the weaning already. I know I should just be enjoying the present, but I'm going to miss the soothing effect that nursing has on him. I love it when he hikes his leg up on my shoulder as if he's just hanging out on a jungle gym, or the sweet little smile he gives me when he's full.

Who knew that your baby could make you long for your pre-baby freedom and yet relish the new life that you have all at once?

Easter

Easter was a crazy busy day, but a good day. Preston looked at his stuff from the Easter bunny and seemed to be impressed. He really liked pulling the fur out of his big purple bunny.

I picked up the girls for Sunday School and Ivan drove separately with Preston because we were running a little bit behind. Apparently the women at Southside have similar tastes because there were four different little boys, including Preston, who had on the same Easter sweater.

Ivan took the girls back to their house after church so they could spend some time with their parents and we had Easter dinner with my family at Nan'-na's.

The church Easter egg hunt was supposed to be on Sat. and we had made the decision to not even mention it to the girls, even though I have taken them in previous years, just because the weekend was going to be so busy with Grandma's surprise party and John Mark and Karen's visit. Then Catlin called me Sat. morning and told me that church had called her and said the Easter egg hunt (which she previously knew nothing about) had been changed to Easter Sunday at 4:30. Bummer. That meant they wanted to go and I had to have all three kids by myself as Ivan, Mom, and Dad all had practice for the Sunday evening Easter service at 4:30. The girls had a big time though.

Catlin got to take the Lord's Supper for the first time. I ended up out in the hall with Preston and Hannah as both were being loud. Of course, when one of the deacons brought out the bread and grape juice, Hannah asked about it and I told her, "When you get bigger and ask Jesus into your heart," etc., etc., the whole discussion. She told me that her daddy had asked Jesus into his heart. I said, "What's your daddy doing right now?" She said, "Laying tile." Then I said, "Do you know what that makes your daddy?" And she said, "A goober?" She is so funny! Then I told her that makes him a backslider. So she told me she is a back slider at Misty's. I'm pretty sure she means that she goes down the slide backwards at Misty's (her babysitter's), so I explained that a backslider is someone who knows they should go to church but they don't. She said, "Oh yeah, my daddy's a backslider." I can't wait to tell Doug!!!

Pics with the Easter Bunny

As you can see, we took Hannah and Preston to Paducah to see the Easter bunny. Different weekends and that wasn't the main goal of either trip. Actually, we hadn't even considered it when we took Hannah. We had taken Hannah and Catlin shopping with us to buy them Easter dresses. However, when Hannah saw that you could sit with the Easter bunny, she went crazy. Catlin thought she was too old for that :(

We went back to Paducah this weekend to try to find a few outfits for Preston and a couple of things for me. I didn't get half the stuff done that I wanted too. Preston wasn't very cooperative. He's really in a clingy phase. I hope that phase is a short one. He's wearing me out. However, the line for the Easter bunny was short again, so we couldn't pass up having his picture made too. I was a little worried that he wouldn't go, but once he saw the hair on the Easter bunny's arm, he was sold!

And Hannah's pose was not at all prompted by an adult. The photographer took one photo with Hannah just sitting and smiling and then she said, "One more," and Hannah popped those hands up to her face. What a character!

New Resolution

First of all, I love Tivo. It's one of my top five material possessions and EVERY new parent should have one. That said, I watched Tuesday's Oprah on Tivo yesterday. It was about various subjects, one of them being an idea that a pastor at a Unity church had that developed into a bracelet campaign. He preached a sermon about not complaining and now they have a bracelet they use (and will mail to others who request it). I think it says "complaint free world." It's purple. You're supposed to wear the bracelet for at least 21 days. According to this guy, it takes 21 days to truly change a habit. Every time you complain, you're supposed to change the wrist the bracelet is on and start all over with another 21 days.

So, I think I'm going to try it. I'm not going to get the bracelet, I'm just going to try not complaining. He and Oprah discussed what was truly a complaint and some of that is open to interpretation. Oprah's question was, "If you honk at someone in front of you because they haven't noticed the light is green, is that complaining?" The minister said it depended on your intent.

That means I'm going to do some of my own interpreting. I'm not resolving to be nice all the time. That's just too much change at once. So, if I don't like someone, I'm still going to say, "I don't like him." Wow, as I type that, that sounds so juvenile. Maybe I need to work on that too. Still, it's not a full-fledged resolution. However, I'm going to work on this "no complaining" thing. No more complaining about the temperature in my office, being tired, Preston crying, etc. We'll see!

Easter candy

I truly think the Easter holiday brings with it the best holiday candy of the year.....Peeps, Cadbury eggs, Reese's eggs, and M&M speckled eggs.

Now, I know you can get most of the above items at other holidays now. Peeps are now available at Halloween and Christmas with different colors and shapes, Reese's makes trees at Christmas, etc. However, I've gotta stick with the originals. A ghost Peep is just not the same as a rabbit peep. And the Reese's egg is so much better than a Reese's. There is so much more peanut butter.

The first sighting of Cadbury eggs in the spring just brings me joy. Now I have a new favorite as well.....M&M speckled eggs. At first, I was worried that these would be like malted eggs...yuck. Well, they're not. Think M&M's the size of peanut M&M's but without the peanut! Just huge chunks of chocolate with a crisp candy coating. Off to the grocery I go!

Happy Baby

Here is a recent picture of Preston after we had been playing outside watching Ivan through balls for the dogs to catch and bring back to us. Preston LOVES watching "our" dog, Prince. Really, he's owned by Doug and Elaine but he doesn't know that as he decided to live at our house long ago. I don't like him, but Hannah and Preston seem to love him, so I guess I have a small soft spot for him.

I certainly love it when Preston sees Prince and starts kicking his legs because he is so excited. Both Sam and Prince are really good with Preston. Preston has pulled Sam's hair and Sam has tolerated it.

A great day of mothering

I have a wonderful boss and he has let me work just four days a week since I started the third trimester of my pregnancy. I usually take my day off on Friday, but this week, I was off on Tuesday as Mom was out of town and Louise was not feeling well. FINALLY, I had a day that turned out to be what I thought motherhood would be. Don't get me wrong, I've had good days before now, but Tuesday was my first day off with Preston that was just perfect....well close....

He woke up at 5:20. That's not so perfect. But he slept through the night and I guess beggers can't be choosers. We played and watched Sesame Street and I actually got to take a shower while he was engrossed in the tv. I turned off the water expecting to hear crying, but he surprised me. We met my friend, Brandy, and her little girl, Claire, for breakfast. Trust me, there were days I never thought I'd be able to sit through a meal out with Preston if Ivan or Mom were not there to help me.

Anyway, breakfast went well. It was the first time Brandy and I had dined with kids, so we didn't get to chat like we normally do, but it was still nice. The weather was great, so Preston and I walked across the street to Bowles to visit with Shelia and then headed to see my grandmother as she had not gotten to see him in awhile.

I had to go to the grocery store too and he fell asleep between Grandma's and the grocery. He miraculously stayed asleep from the car to the grocery and then through the car ride back to the house. He woke up as soon as we got home and we had more play time. Then, he started getting sleepy around three and I took him with me to my bedroom praying that he would sleep for more than 30 minutes so I could get a nap too. He slept for two hours! Now, I'm not a co-sleeper except for the occasional nap. I'm just too light of a sleeper for it. I didn't sleep for the whole two hours that Preston did, but I slept off and on. And it was nice that even when he did wake me with his wiggling and noises...I love to just know he's there and see how beautiful he is.

Finally......a motherhood day as I thought they would all be...8.5 months into Preston's life.....boy, was I dumb!

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Catlin is 8!!!

My baby is eight today! Technically, there are two things wrong with that statement. First, Catlin is not technically "mine." She is my niece. However, her mother has been gracious enough to let me pretend that she is partially mine. For that matter, she's not even my brother's child--she is Ivan's sister's child. But, we have a "princess" bond that makes us as close as any family relationship. Second, she is certainly not a baby...she's now eight. Sometimes I question whether or not she was ever a baby! She has always seemed so mature.

Catlin is such a special girl. She has such a sweet and tender heart. Ivan and I have so many special memories of her. A few stand out. When she was two or three, Ivan and I were at his parents house and Catlin asked if she could go home with us. The answer to that question was "yes" almost every time she asked. Ivan had just gotten a new truck, so she was sitting in between us. About half way to our house, she put one arm around Ivan's neck and one arm around mine and said, "You guys is just my best friends." I think both of us would have done anything she asked at that point.

In December 2003, I was taking Catlin and her sister, Hannah, to my Nan-na's house to visit with my family for Christmas. Hannah was just four months old. I'm not sure what exactly Catlin and I were talking about, but I told her that things would be different between us when she got bigger and she wouldn't be as excited to hang out with us as she was at that time. She told me then that she would always, "love you like I love you when when I'm little." Talk about precious!

Ivan and I took her to Disney World the following month. That's when I think Ivan discovered the true magic of Disney. It was so special to see Disney through Catlin's eyes. She was a joy and her behavior was perfect.

Traveling with Catlin is always fun. Elaine has let us drag her on many trips to different states. Never once have I had to be concerned about her attitude or behavior. She fits into any situation and finds the fun in it.

I was concerned about her when Hannah was born. Catlin had been the center of so many worlds and her world was certainly getting ready to change! However, never once have I seen her be ugly to her sister. She is the best big sister that I know. Hannah's happiness is always at the forefront of Catlin's mind and she is so selfless when it comes to her sister.

Now that I have a baby of my own, she has been such a help to me. She remains calm even when I don't. When Preston cries, it doesn't bother her, she just tries to make him happy.

My happiest moment of all in Catlin's life came in October when she asked Jesus to come into her heart and be her Lord and Saviour. I can't wait to see what God does with her!

I truly believe that God has great things in store for Catlin's life....she has already blessed our lives beyond measure in the last eight years!